Come back
by Kaytee Kudo
Summary: Amiboshi's memories start to come back after ten years of being Kaika. This is the continuation of my fic, "The One that Called you Brother"...Amiboshi's POV...Please Review. thanks
1. The Forgotten Memory

Come Back  
  
By Kaytee Kudo  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi or any of its characters. I only like them. (especially Amiboshi and Suboshi) I will not use them for commercial purposes so please, don't sue me.  
  
Chapter 1---A Forgotten Memory  
  
Kaika had just made a move that would change his life forever. He had just proposed to the woman of his dreams---the woman that he dreamed of marrying. That woman was Hime, the most popular girl from the other village, the girl whom he had fallen for the moment he laid eyes on.   
  
It was really a dream come true, being just the son of a poor farmer who lives in a small, peaceful village. His life had really changed since the day he met a strange man and gave him a chance for a free education. That man was Hime's father. When the man was there for a vacation, he had heard Kaika play the flute and liked its music. Kaika was asked to play for the man in his house everyday and in return, he would send him to the finest school around.   
  
That was how he first met Hime. While he plays his flute, Hime would sit beside her father and listen too. Sometimes, when she feels like it, she would also sing to the tune Kaika was playing, and her father would be very happy. Her father had once said that the two of them looked great together, and the two would just smile and blush. Kaika liked Hime very much since then. She had the sweetest smile and had always treated him like an equal. She told many great stories to him and even helped him at school. But most of all, she was there when he needs a shoulder to cry on, a helping hand, or even just a friend to keep company. When his parents died, she was there to comfort him and even helped him take care of his brother, Kaihan. In other words, she was a woman he had never seen before, she was the girl he had intended to marry.  
  
Hime had accepted his proposal, of course, and even her family, but with a condition. It was not a very easy task, since her condition is to discover his true identity and let all those connected to him---even in his past life, accept Hime as his wife, but he agreed to it anyway.  
  
Hime's intentions were for the good of everyone. It all started the day Kaika's father died with a dying message. Kaika's father confessed to Kaika that he and his brother, Kaihan, were really adopted. He told them about Kaihan's parents, that they died in the war between Kotou and Konan, and that Kaihan was entrusted to them before they died. For Kaika, it was a different story. He was told that they had never met his real parents, for they had found him unconscious in the river, and decided to call him Kaika, as their own son. Kaika's heart was devastated. For years, all he had believed in was a lie. He had told this to Hime, who had comforted him.  
  
_ "It's all right, Kaika-chan. Maybe it was all for the best."  
  
"They should have just told the truth when they had found me. I would have loved them just the same but...."  
  
"They wanted to protect you."  
  
"I...."  
  
"Listen, Kaika-chan. You should get a hold of yourself. Forget about what they did and live in the present. You should be thankful for them for taking care of you even though they don't know who you are. There's still a chance to discover your true self. Maybe those strange dreams you've been telling me are connected to your past."  
  
"Hime-chan."  
  
"Don't worry, I'll help you all the way. "  
  
_ Although Hime did all her best t help him, all their searches were in vain. It had been ten years now since the old couple had found him on the river, but there were still no clues on his past. Only his dreams seem to keep him searching for his past, but it was not enough to connect it to anything, as they were only flashes of a scene.  
  
For many times he had tried to give up on searching for his true self, but his dreams keep haunting him to go on, and in all of his dreams he had seen the same strange boy---over and over. One time he had dreamt of playing with the boy, telling him a story and even carrying him home. He had dreamt of protecting the boy with all his might. Sometimes, he will dream of the same boy---but a little older, that he was already fighting, listening while he plays the flute and most especially, he had dreamt of promising that boy that he will always be there on his side. But then, in all of these dreams he had not managed to even have a glimpse of the boy's face, and it made the dreams useless.  
  
It was only until last night that he had dreamt of the boy again. He dreamt that he was wounded from protecting a girl and was about to be killed when the boy had saved him. The boy asked so many questions and he tried to answer it with care. He had offered the boy a drink and took it, and then kissed him....  
  
As strange as the dream may be, Kaika believed that the dream may be the key in remembering all of his lost memory, and he would hold on to it no matter what.  
  
For now, he would try to convince the only family he knew, his brother Kaihan. There he was, waiting for him by the gate as usual. He has really loved this boy like a real brother, his family. A strange thought had hit him, as he greeted Kaihan with a hug. It was that maybe, the love he was feeling now for Kaihan was the same as he had for the boy in his dreams.  
  
"How's your day, nii-chan?"  
  
"Well, as always, it was great. Oh! I have great news for you!"  
  
"Really? What is it?"  
  
"Well, we'll have a new member in the family!"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because, I'M GONNA GET MARRIED!! Are you happy?"  
  
From his great smile and excitement, Kaika didn't notice that his brother had greeted the news with a frown. "That's great, nii-chan," Kaihan replied in a dull voice. It only took that to help Kaika figure that his brother doesn't agree to the planned marriage.  
  
"Well, why aren't you happy?" asked the confused Kaika.  
  
"It's nothing, nii-chan. I'm happy for you." Kaihan replied which sounded quite the contrary.  
  
"Look, whatever you're thinking about this, I'm just gonna say that I love Hime and after the marriage, I'll still be your brother, I promise."  
  
"Okay, Thanks nii-chan." Kaihan said in a low voice, and went to his room.  
  
Kaika was about to follow his young brother when it had happened. The flashes that had been haunting him at night had returned, only now he was still awake. He clutched his head in pain.  
  
_ "Don't go aniki! Let someone else do it!"  
  
"I'm the only one they could trust."  
  
"Please, don't leave me again. We've just reunited."  
  
"But I've already promised Nakago that I will go tonight. I have to go there, it's the only way to obtain peace throughout Kotou."  
  
"You'll get killed! Why can't I go with you?"  
  
"You have to stay here so that Nakago will know what they're doing. Besides...." He looked at the boy who was clutching his shoulders tightly, tears flowing in his face.  
  
"We can communicate with our link. I'll come back. I promise."  
  
"Really? Do you really promise to come back?"  
  
"Yes, I'll never forget you. No matter what."  
  
_ Kaika's head continued to ache as he rushed to his room. It was the first time that he had seen the face of the boy, but it was blurred and distorted. Much more, he had heard of new names, Nakago and Kotou. "This is getting worse," he thought, and decided that he would get help from a doctor.  
  
***  
  
"Please wait here, Kaika-san."  
  
"Okay," Kaika replied to the kind nurse. He had followed his heart and visited a doctor the next day. Hime had suggested seeing this doctor, as he was known in all places as the miracle doctor, a student of the late Mitsukake, a healer and also a Suzaku Seishi. Hime had particularly said that this doctor was an expert in mind cases, what she had called 'amnesia'. But then, since the doctor was famous, many people visit him all the time, and since Kaika's problem is not as worse, he was made to wait for a long time. Smiling, he looked for anything to do until he saw two boys playing outside, and then it happened again. He felt that it was becoming worse and worse and he could see a clearer picture of things. It was the boy again, but a bit younger. They were playing like the two boys he had seen.  
  
_ "Aniki!" The boy was calling him, half-laughing.  
  
"What is it, Shunkaku-chan?"  
  
"Why can't I run as fast as you?"  
  
"Well, that's because you're not running as fast as you can."  
  
"I can't catch you now then. C'mon, let's race to that hill!"  
  
"Not now!"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because, Shun-chan, you've already played long enough. See, you're already wet from sweat. You'll get sick again and then we couldn't play at all."  
  
"But we'll play again if I rest for a while, right?"  
  
"Yes, if you really want to."  
  
"Okay, because next time, I'll beat you, aniki!"  
  
"Oh yeah? That won't happen 'cause I won't let you!"  
  
"We'll see about that." They both laughed.  
  
"Ne, aniki. Tell me a story."  
  
"About what, Shun-chan?"  
  
"About anything."  
  
"But I'm not a great story-teller like mom."  
  
"Oh? But I like your stories too."  
  
"How about a song?"  
  
"Okay, that would be great too."  
  
_ Kaika managed to get himself back to reality, but it was not for long. When he saw a wounded boy rushed to the doctor for help, another dream came.  
  
_ "What do you mean he's sick?!"  
  
"Please, ma'am. My brother is sick so he couldn't work today."  
  
"No! That boy had been sick many times! You, wake up!" The woman violently shook a young boy, red-hot with fever.   
  
"Enough of this nonsense! Work now!"  
  
"Please stop, he needs to rest." He tried to hold back the old woman, but he was thrown over and had hit the hard wall.  
  
"And he needs to work for his stay!"  
  
  
  
Kaika felt that he was about to cry, until a hand touched him. "It's okay....aniki. I can work" The young boy smiled at Kaika, now on a verge of tears.  
  
"And you've got to! Hmph!"  
  
"I'll be all right, don't worry, aniki."  
  
_ Tears freely flowed in his eyes.  
  
"Kaika-san! Kaika-san!" It was a voice from the nurse that made Kaika snap back to reality.  
  
"The doctor will be seeing you."  
  
"Oh." Kaika wiped his tear-damp face and proceeded to the doctor's room.  
  
He was welcomed by a warm smile from the doctor. The room looked very pleasant and comfortable. The doctor offered him a seat.  
  
"So, Kaika-san, what's wrong?"  
  
"Umm, it's just that I had been dreaming of strange things, and lately, it's been haunting me even if I'm awake."  
  
"Oh. It sounds like repressed memories are coming back."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"I call it amnesia, Kaika-san. It seems like you have a forgotten memory that tries to surge to your consciousness. Amnesia happens when you try to repress a painful experience or when you took a kind of drug that made you forget. Anyway, it makes you forget everything about it."  
  
"So now, my mind wants to remember those memories."  
  
"I guess so. Many people who suffer from amnesia have suffered painful experiences from their early life that they couldn't bear, that's why they want to repress it. But those memories are permanently stored in their minds, so a time comes when those experiences some back fresh to their mind."  
  
"Then, I can remember my past life again?"  
  
"From the looks of it, you will soon regain your memory. Remember, Kaika-san, memories like these are to be accepted, not forgotten."  
  
Those were the words that keep talking in Kaika's mind when he left for home.  
  



	2. The Return of the Memory

Come Back  
  
By Kaytee Kudo  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi or any of its characters. I only like them. (especially Amiboshi and Suboshi) I will not use them for commercial purposes so please, don't sue me.  
  
Chapter 2---The Return of the Memory  
  
Many weeks passed. And now, a month has come. Kaika had been very busy preparing for the wedding that he didn't notice that it would be next week. He had tried to prevent the flashes to conquer him but to no avail. Now, he had seen many of his past memories unfolding, but he still couldn't figure out who he is. They have never told him. All he knew is that the boy was always called Shunkaku, and they were always together in Kotou, but were separated. The other things he had dreamt made no sense to him, and he thought that maybe, the separation made him forget about everything. Maybe it was really painful enough to forget.  
  
He was preparing everything on the church's office. There was a special room there, built especially for those about to be married. There, you can put everything needed for the wedding, clothes, decorations and all. Kaika looked at the room. Everything looked great, until a knock at the door caught his attention. It was the girl-attendant at the church.  
  
"Kaika-san. Your brother is outside."  
  
"Let him in. I've been waiting for him."   
  
He had really been waiting for Kaihan. It has been a month since he had actually talked to his brother. He had always said that he should come here if he was ready to accept Hime to the family. Perhaps, this was the time. He heard him go inside, and closed the door. At once, Kaika started talking. But he was looking at the window, as if waiting to see Hime at the road. Yes, Hime was another person he had been longing to see, for Hime left without a word a month ago. He had many things to tell her too.  
  
"I've been expecting you," Kaika started. "So, have you tried the suit I gave you?"  
  
He could feel his brother's uneasiness, and decided to face him and hug him.  
  
"I'm so glad you've finally accepted Hime-chan to our family. I'm so proud of you little---" Kaika stopped talking as he saw the face of his 'expected' brother. He was shocked to see that it was not Kaihan who had came to see him, but he was more surprised to see his own face---no, he didn't thought that it was possible but then, the boy looked like him. It was like they were really brothers. Without controlling his feelings, Kaika blurted out, "Why, you're not my brother. What're you doing here?"  
  
The words had obviously affected the stranger very much. He froze to the spot and looked grave. Then, Kaika's head had hurt again. He tried to ask for help but the boy had been seep in his thoughts, too shocked to move. And so, he fell into the hard ground trapped again in his lost memory.  
  
_ "Listen Koutoku, you have to be strong now. You need to take care of your brother for us."  
  
"But dad! I can't leave you. I can't...." tears had started to swell up in his eyes.  
  
"Take that flute with you and save your brother. We've left him out on the barn so you have to hurry up. It's okay, go on."  
  
"Dad...."  
  
"You're a strong boy, Koutoku. You're a Seiryuu Seishi. You have to protect this world. Protect your brother. Go on, hurry!"  
  
He felt that he was rushing to his feet on the hot ground. It seemed that the whole house was on fire. Many people were dead and soldiers were looting the village. He clutched his flute tightly and found his way to---the boy.  
  
"ANIKI!!!"  
  
"SHUNKAKU!!!"  
  
He rushed to the boy and raised both his hands protectively. Several men had been trying to beat him up. They had been talking about selling them. Unconsciously, he raised his flute and started playing it. He didn't looked to see the men clutching their heads in pain, screaming, and then dying. He was deep in his thoughts, tears freely flowing in his eyes.  
  
"I will protect my brother with all my life. I will always protect him, until we find peace again."  
  
_ The memory ended, sending him back to reality as he could hear his brother's voice again, but he could hear him shouting roughly.  
  
"Kaihan!" He automatically shouted, not minding the tears still in his eyes. "What have I told you about speaking to your elders?"  
  
He couldn't believe it. He was back to the real world. He thought that it would never end but it did. He felt extreme sadness in that dream, as if he could never be happy again. He could hear his brother's voice again, apologizing. The stranger spoke. "Are you okay?" The man asked him a question.  
  
"Yes, I'm okay." He was lying. "I'm sorry about that. My brother, Kaihan was just worried about me. What can I do for you?"  
  
"A-ami---boshi...." Kaika was shocked about what he had heard. Amiboshi? He had only heard Koutoku, Shunkaku and even Nakago, but not Amiboshi. He was caught in a bigger surprise when the boy hugged him, and cried on his shoulder.  
  
"It's really you. I've been waiting for a long time to see you...."  
  
But because Kaika was really shocked, all he could say was, "I'm sorry. Who are you?"  
  
"It's me, Suboshi."   
  
"Su---boshi?" It doesn't ring a bell.  
  
"Yes, don't you remember?"  
  
Kaika tried to put all the words he had heard together.   
  
"I'm Ami---boshi? Your aniki?" The boy nodded.  
  
All of these sounded strange, thought Kaika, and convinced himself that the boy was wrong. He was not the boy in his dreams.  
  
"I'm sorry. I think that you've got the wrong person. You see, I'm Kaika, and my only brother is that boy, Kaihan." He pointed to his brother who was watching him intently.  
  
He felt sorry for the boy to go all sad like that, like his whole world has fallen apart. It must be a very important person in his life to look very down.   
  
"I'm sorry to see you leave on a fruitless search. I know you'll find him really soon." Kaika said this to try to comfort the poor guy.  
  
But then, there was something in his eyes, Kaika thought._ "And he looked a lot like me, perhaps, there really is something...."_ When the boy was about to leave, a strange feeling had struck Kaika. It was a very strange feeling indeed, as if he could die any moment if the boy would leave even a second, right before his eyes. "There's got to be something with that boy," he thought._ "I've got to do something"_.  
  
"You can stay at our house for a few days if you'd like. You can rest there if you want, I know you've been to a long journey."  
  
As the young man agreed, Kaika felt a strange relief in himself. It felt awkward. Even as they walk on their way to the house, he can't help but steal a glance on the strange boy. He couldn't explain his feelings and he didn't like it. He even felt shame rush in him as he welcomed the boy to their house. As soon as they entered the house, he rushed to the kitchen with some excuse.  
  
He tried to prepare dinner, but he couldn't. He was filled with emotions. Much more, he couldn't even explain it, even to himself. Soon, flashes had conquered his mind once again, as he glanced at the dark woods through the kitchen window.  
  
_ He was alone, in the shadows of the deep, dark woods, but he didn't feel lonely. He was playing his flute vigorously, and he was wearing ragged clothes. Pretty soon, a woman went outside to search for the mysterious tune. Then, bats came attacking the young woman. Instantly, he changed the tune of the flute to kill the bats, and rescue the girl. It was like he had already known what would happen. Surprisingly, he came forward and pretended that he was wounded. As the woman rushed to see if he's okay, he told a lie, that his village was attacked---and even his name. The girl saw a mark near his stomach and looked both surprised and happy. Soon, many people rushed to help him.  
  
Quite suddenly, the scene had changed again. He was playing the flute once more, but more fiercely and he could feel strong spirits surrounding him. Everyone in the room except for him were covering their ears, screaming in pain, yet he doesn't know why they act like that to such a beautiful melody he had played. A smile escaped from his lips as he played harder, and faster. Until out of nowhere, a stranger, distant tune echoed through his melodies. A fresh type of fear had suddenly filled him, and made him loose his concentration. He couldn't bear to see the scene that welcomed him as soon as he stopped playing. Everyone were looking at him---with anger, or maybe fear. He had seen them look at the sign of 'ko' glowing brightly blue on his right shoulder, and he was scared at their reaction. With great haste, he ran as fast as he could, towards the door, away from that place, anywhere, just to escape the great fear that he was feeling. Angry men were following him, just as he had thought. He had to get out of that place. Then, he was trapped. A fierce-moving river had made him stop on his tracks, but only for a moment. He knew that he had to go away from that place, even if it means death. Without minding the people who had warned him about the strong currents, he jumped and tried to make it on the other side, but he couldn't. And now, as he was about to fall, the only thing he could think of is his brother. He was about to hit the rough water when a hand had grabbed his flute, and tried to save him. It was the face of the girl he had saved not so long ago. She was telling him to hold on, that he really was a good man. But he felt that everything was too late. He was wrong in believing that he could end the war by tricking them. He was wrong. He felt that it would be better to end it, and let go of his most prized possession. As he heard the girl's scream, he could see himself cry and say,  
  
"I'm sorry, brother, but I broke my promise."  
  
_ Kaika was on his knees when he realized that he was back in his own kitchen. His clothes were drenched from his tears, and even now, he was still crying. He realized that he was clutching himself. What he had felt was very painful. After getting a hold of himself, he decided to check back on the two. They may be worried if he won't show up for a long time. He found them talking very intently at each other, and smiled.  
  
"It seems that you're getting along pretty well. I'm happy for you both."  
  
It took their attention and looked at him with awe, like he was their hero.   
  
"The two of you have a lot of things in common."  
  
A great laughter followed his statement, which was interrupted by a loud knock at the door. Kaihan rushed to see who it is, and as soon as he opened the door, Kaika's heart pounded hhard to see who the visitor was.  
  
"Hime-chan!" Joy filled his heart as he saw the woman of his dreams. He had been longing to see her for a month, for he had many things to tell her. Filled with anxiety, he clumsily offered her a seat and gave her a drink.  
  
"How are you?" was the first thought that came up on Kaika's mind.  
  
"It's nothing Kaika-chan. I just want to talk to you, that's all." That was the voice had needed to calm down. For Kaika, it was the sweetest voice he had ever heard, never failing to soothe him. As he saw the two boys go outside, he tried to tell Hime everything, but he didn't know where to start. Thankfully, Hime had noticed this and decided to talk first.  
  
"I'm so sorry for leaving you without telling, Kaika-chan. It's just that my mom came and said I had to go with her. I hope that nothing bad had happened. My father said that you're visiting the house everyday, looking for me."  
  
It was true. He had been longing to tell her everything. In fact, before he came to the church office this day, he went to check if Hime was there. From the looks of it, it seems that Hime had just came back, and went straight to him.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry for letting you worry like that" Kaika said, blushing.  
  
"So, are you okay? How's the visit with the doctor?"  
  
"I'm fine, really. No need to worry about me, hahaha"  
  
Hime looked at him straight in the eye. She knew that he was lying at her. Kaika saw this and knew tat it's no use lying to Hime.  
  
"I'm sorry Hime"  
  
"Please, tell me what's wrong" Hime held his hand tightly. Kaika's face looked grave.  
  
"Oh, Hime. I've been longing to tell you this. My condition is getting worse. The doctor said it's amnesia, just like you said. And he said that at this rate, my memory will come back soon."  
  
"But isn't that great news? You've been wanting to know who you really are, right?"  
  
Kaika looked at Hime as tears started to flow in his eyes.  
  
"I'm scared, Hime. I'm afraid of knowing my past."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"The doctor said that a person who suffers from amnesia usually have a painful experience that they want to forget, and I think he's right."  
  
"You see, every time I see another bit of my memory, I feel like crying. Everything is so dark and I feel very sad. It's a painful experience to see those dreams, and I'm scared that if I remember these memories, all it will bring me is pain."  
  
Hime couldn't stand seeing Kaika cry like that. She came closer to him and hugged him, patting him on the back. "It's okay. Go on."   
  
Kaika was half-crying as he tried to tell everything---about the boy, his promise to his dad, the girl he had hurt, the people who were angry at him and tried to catch him, but most of all, the feeling, the feeling that he felt as he saw all of those things flashed right through his very eyes.  
  
"I broke my promise to the boy, Hime....A-and then I tried to kill many people, they tried to kill me. There were many dead people, and fire. War is always present in my dreams. I have never felt so alone, so sad and helpless. I don't want to remember it, Hime. I just don't want to...."  
  
"It's all right, Kaika-chan. That is a normal feeling." Hime interrupted.  
  
"But you should not avoid the past. You must accept it. That's the only way to make you a better person." Hime hugged him more tightly. "Even nightmares have good sides." She looked at his tear-filled eyes. "And if you're afraid, I'll always be here for you. I promise." And then, she kissed Kaika deeply. Kaika was shocked at first , but soon felt warm and secure and liked it. Another memory came back to him, but this time, a feeling. It was the feeling he had when his brother had kissed him back then, and it was like this.  
  
"I love you, Kaika. My love will never change for you, even if your name would change a thousand times." Once again, tears flowed in his eyes like a flood. He hugged her tight and cried on her shoulder.  
  
"I love you too, Hime. Thank you for letting me know that."  
  
It finally happened. His memory had come back completely---and he was not afraid of it. As he saw two boys racing toward them, he also ran to meet them. They stopped in the middle of the road. Kaika, no, Amiboshi didn't realize that he was crying again. Suboshi smiled.  
  
"There's nothing to say sorry about, I understand, aniki."  
  
"I'm sorry that I broke my promise to you."  
  
"Hey, you didn't break that promise. You came back, right? It's all that matters to me." Amiboshi stopped crying and hugged him again.  
  
"Suboshi! Thank you for bringing me my memory back."  
  
"No, aniki, you were the one who did it."  
  
"I love you, dear brother."  
  
"I love you too, aniki." He proceeded to hug Kaihan too. "I love you too, little Kaihan." Kaihan smiled.  
  
"I'm not afraid of my past anymore. I figured that it's not as dark as I thought." He looked at the three people smiling back at him.  
  
"Thank you, everyone. I'll never forget this memory." They all hugged Amiboshi and smiled.  
  
"Let's go home, " Amiboshi suggested.  
  
"Yes, let's go. I'll make dinner." Hime said as she held Amiboshi's hand.  
  
"Yay!" both Suboshi and Kaihan shouted.  
  
"Hey, nii-chan! We're not through with our race yet." Kaihan started running.  
  
"Oh yeah? I'll catch you again!" Suboshi ran too.  
  
Two boys ran fast as the two lovers share the sunset walking hand-in-hand together.  
  
~END~  
  



End file.
